What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two guys walk into a bar. They have drinks, pay for them, then get into a car crash killing a mom and her daughter returning home from selecting a wedding dress. The wedding is canceled. Rate This Comment 0

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He stepped on a piece of a shattered bottle from a bar fight. Don't worry, though, it was just a little cut and he felt fine after a few beers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the black guy say when he failed his math test? Crap, I failed my math test!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops