a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

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what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

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What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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