Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

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What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

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Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

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What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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your so vein that doctors find you really helpful when giving you injections

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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