What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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knock knock? come in

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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