How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

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Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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The Juice where prosecuted by many time.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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What do you call a man holding a bible? A man holding a bible. What do you call a woman holding a bible? A women holding a bible. What do you call a man and a women holding a bible? A man and a women holding a bible.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops