Hey Lady Gaga, Madonna called, she wants her clothes back; she lend them to you weeks ago for a concert because you didn't have anything to wear and you haven't returned them yet.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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Why did the little boy fall out the window? A child molester pushed him.

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A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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