A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

What is life? Paul.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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