Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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the chicken crossed the road. the chicken was then caught by animal control because it was in the middle of a city.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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What do you call Americans Watching Canadians? Hockey

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There's my tractor.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

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How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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