Did you hear the one about the guy who couldnt find his shoes? No? ok ill talk to someone who will get the reference

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

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What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

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Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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Try it Yourself »

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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