Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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sadf

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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