Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

hashtags suck balls

ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

This is my favorite antijoke.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

A miserable man committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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