A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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