How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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Q. Why do some people not like anti-jokes? A. They don't find the humor funny.

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Matt is a Duster!

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

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They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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what is a mix of a bull dog and a shih tzu. a bread of dog that has a shaggy face and long hair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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