They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

Things i love to hate: Conspiracy theorists Religious fundamentalists Hypocritical people Sally (she has no arms) People selling pyramid schemes Liars, con-artists, thieves. Rapists, child molesters, serial killers Terrorists, politicians, and keyboard warriors That is all.

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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