What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A mexican walks out a mexican restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops