Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

Jeff

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Someone else's cheese.

How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

::ring::ring::ring:: Hello? Is your refrigerator running? Yes, yes it does! Why? I work for a local home appliance superstore and we are having a special on repairs and maintenance. Would you like to try our home appliance maintenance offer? I'm sorry no! I do not actually have a refrigerator. I only have a cooler. Bye! ::the man shuts off his cell phone and sets it on top of his styro-foam cooler as he mumbles to himself alone while on his boat, "Darn advertisement offers!" and continues to fish in the middle of the lake::

Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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