A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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your life

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

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What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

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why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

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If the 49ers won the superbowl

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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When The bus came by Jimmy went bye-bye

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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