Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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A white man got injected by Heroin at a party and got instantly addicted.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

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Women's Rights.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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