Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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no.

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

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What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

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Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had a small penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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