A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

who is gay wit mon james cornish

An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

Why are you gay? Because ***** you

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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