What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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Why can't black guys eat babby back ribs... Beacause They are black too

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How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb.

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

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your mom is so fat that when she walks in America with a yellow coat as they get a taxi

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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Phew... it's gone.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

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What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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