What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

What did the coworker say about the new girls butt Nothing be cause he was quite the gentleman and wanted to be respectful ts the woman as she already had enough problems such as being hit by a bus and dying.

What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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