Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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David Cameron

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops