Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

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people magazine

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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ever tried african food? they neither

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops