Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

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Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

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Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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