Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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