Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Guess what my nephew said yesterday? oh wait, i forgot hes dead..

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Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

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Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

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PENIS lol

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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How did the idiot die? He comitted suicide because people were picking on his stupidity. (If you laughed at this you are a horrible person)

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

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One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

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god made the sea god helped invent the first wheel but as you know he also made me a really big deal !

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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