I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

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You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

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When black people wore their pants low, white people called it "Saggin" little did they know that "saggin" spelled backwards is "white supremacy" those sneaky white people

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops