A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? That boy that dropped a perfectly good ice cream cone from a road accident involving a bus due to lack of road safety awareness Oh yeah, and I guess the fact that he probably died or was injured for life is pretty bad too

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Who won the race through the underpass, the black man or the polish man? The black man as he crossed the finish line several seconds earlier.

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

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Your mother just died.

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A penguin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops