What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

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How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

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Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

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Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

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Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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