What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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Why did the big refrigerator fall down the cheese Because i licked my own ear and it got scared and cheese for no raiSOnsD

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

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Why did the little boy with hepititess die? his mther drove him into the river!

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and about not being funny.

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops