Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

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How can you tell if a duck is behind you? Turn around

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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