What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

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whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

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Why did the chicken walk across the road? Because chickens cannot fly

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There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

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What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet, so he/she can put it down.

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops