Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

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Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Your adopted

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Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops