What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

Justin's life

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

What long black and tasty? Licorice

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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