How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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Black People

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

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Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

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What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

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Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

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A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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