How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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Why did Alec cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by an axe.

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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Manchester City

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Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

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Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

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When life hands you melons it means you're dyslexic.

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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That awkward moment when a loved one dies.

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whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

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What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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A: What Santa said when he caught Mrs. Claus with one of his elves... Q: What is "Ho ho ho?"

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Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops