How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

thumb_up thumb_down +16

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

You know what they say... Once you go black you...have gone down the road of diversity and it's impossible to back track and return to ones previous misconceptions.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +16

how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

thumb_up thumb_down +16

PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops