The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

thumb_up thumb_down -35

"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what smells like tuna? my underwear

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Women drivers...

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

thumb_up thumb_down -37

There was a irishmen in his house. He was thirsty. so he drank some water

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops