Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

This would be racist to black people if they could read.

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

A young baby died.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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