knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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how did harry styles get in one diretion god

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldn't tell any funny jokes? He went to Anti Joke and posted 1000's.

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What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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Lol XD,now that is bad ass of you to say that, what about her, does she get to go around too?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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