If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Wanna hear a joke??... No...... oh ok :(

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A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

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What did one planet say to the other? Nothing. Space is a vacuum in which sound cannot propagate due to the absence of a matter or particle medium.

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because he was killed by a white cop.

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

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Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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What do you call a snake at a snail convention? A snake at a snail convention.

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get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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what happened to the asian who failed his math quiz... his parents killed him

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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Is your refrigerator running? If so, you are on drugs, and should see help.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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