There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

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What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

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how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

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If life gives you lemonade.

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What's worse than finding a baby in a dumpster? Being late on your taxes

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What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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i had a black friend once......just kidding

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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Why was Rebecca Black beaten with a pole when she sang Friday? It was Saturday

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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Black people.

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How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge? If it is laying in pieces around the crumbled wreckage of your house. [L]

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops