I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

your mom is so rude that she took her t shirt of and her bra of she was not naked how did she get so rude she drank till one brain cell was left

Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

how did the man jump over the mountain? it was a small mountain and he had a trampoline

How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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