Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

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Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops