What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock, Knock! Go away!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

thumb_up thumb_down +24

knock knock go away

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Writing is hard Poems are strong I am muslim And this is a bomb.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

thumb_up thumb_down +22

if you are reading this your wasting your time

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops