What is long hard and woody? A tree.

Why did the man take off his pants A: because they were uncomfortable to sit in

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Yo mama's so fat, she weighs over 400 pounds.

A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

How many blonds douse it take to change a light bulb I dont know it hasn't happened yet

Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

Q: Where's the cheese? Who ate the cheese? A: How do you know it's been eaten because it's gone? Are you making the assumption that food that has disappeared was eaten because that is usually how food disappears? I am filing a lawsuit against you for your malevolent foodism.

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

I was on Facebook today. Opened someones wall. Read "LIKE if you know someone that needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel." So I liked it and wrote my exboyfriend's name.......

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Starving.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

Hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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