One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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frogs are green and grass is greener i just blew up ur mom and ur the cleaner now get to work SLAVE

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Roses are black violets are black I can't hear anything I'm Helen Keller .

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Seriously, all your new jokes are shit. They are either repeats of stuff previously on the site or they are just so unfunny you'd struggle to get a sympathy laugh from your mother. Please actually take the time to think of something worth submitting or do not submit at all. We know people with no arms can't knock on doors enough now, and many things are better than the holocaust. Do something new!

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why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

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A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

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I don't always browse the internet. But when i do i prefer Anti Joke.con

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

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Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

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What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

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What's worse than winning the lottery? Anything, really...

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Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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