whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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Why do i have no likes? Because im disliked...

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I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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Massie is a fatass

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Knock Knock Who's there??? Your mom

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

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Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

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What was 6 affraid of 7? because 7 was black.

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did you hear about the argument between jamie jacob and dylan? daniel killed them all

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Did you hear about the blind man who got stuck by a bus? Poor guy never saw it coming.

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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Nickelback

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Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

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Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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