- Anti Joke

Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

Followers of Neronism: Many outsiders have told us that we hide in the dark, stay away from the ways of this society because we are ashamed of who we are... ...Never forget that we stay in the darkness because we live in a place where we can walk without being ashamed not of ourselves, but of the blind fools around us! They judge, they kill, they make one another suffer and believe that love is sacrificing themselves and their loved ones rather than preserving them all for their fucking Deities! As for those that accuse us of being Satanists, and me for being Satan, remember that this has nothing to do about following God or his fucking castaway son, his supposed equal in power, but about believing in ourselves, and each other. Recently a group of certain "true believers" accused me of being possessed by the devil, until a fucking eight year old asked me if I was Satan... ...As her parents smiled I realized it was them that made her ask me that, so I stared them into the eyes and said: "If I am the kind of being that encourages people to listen to their hearts, to live out their true desires with happiness rather than shame, to live out their hopes and dreams and spread happiness while understanding that love is both about the preservation of self and others and living in the present rather than surrendering free will and life in a gamble for a life after death... ...Then per your definition, you already know who your kin knows me as." Know finally that many call me insane for living out what started as a daydream, then grew into a vision, and has become reality, a society where peace, love, happiness, and unity based on what makes us all the same, rather than those superficial things that make us seem different, and respect and belief for one another rather than for some God has finally become a reality... ...The reason that I left for years at the time was not only in order to build the fundamentals behind our order, but also in order to wonder if I was fucking insane for standing against beliefs that most of the world follow is over... ...Today I can finally point at those questioning my sanity, and shout "YOU ARE THE FUCKING INSANE ONES! YOU ARE THE FUCKING EVIL SCUM OF THE EARTH THAT BRAINWASH YOUR OWN CHILDREN AND BEAT UP YOUR WIVES IN ORDER TO PLEASE SOME FUCKING INVISIBLE HOLY GHOST FROM SPACE OR SOMETHING JUST AS FUCKING STUPID! YOU ARE THE VICTIMS THAT HAVE BEEN TROUGH BRAINWASHING AND FEAR BEEN TRICKED INTO FOLLOWING THE FALSE NOTION YOU CALL "LOVE!" If the beginning of a world where everyone is equal, where respect for yourself and your own kin is law, brings us into an order, and perhaps one day into a world of peace, wealth, love, care, and understanding is Satan, is insanity... THEN I AM OFFICIALLY SATAN THE INSANE! AND IF THIS IS NOT RIGHT, THEN I WANT TO BE WRONG! IF FEAR OF DYING IS EXACTLY WHAT STOPS RELIGIOUS ONES FROM LIVING THEIR OWN LIFE! THEN THEY ARE THE WEAK ONES NOT EVEN DARING TO FACE LIFE! And that I can finally wake up from those dreams where I feel as if I am Satan... And wake up and shout to all "THE HELL WITH WHAT I AM! GODS ARE WHAT EVIL IS!" And then I feel shame... Shame for ever believing myself to be equal with these fucking humans of which few realize how fucking wrong religion is, and those that do, just stand there doing nothing to stop the abuse, the destruction, the brainwashing of children which again become parents which again send their children into war plunging this world into suffering! ALL TO APPRAISE SOMETHING THEY HAVE NEVER EVEN SEEN BUT FEAR SO MUCH "for love" THAT THEY DESTROY THEIR OWN CHILDREN! I am pissed... How could I have spent so much time doubting what is today reality, thanks to all that made this happen, and my pity to all that allow their own fear, to destroy not only their own lives, but those of their loved ones.

Radical thinkers have decided to end abortion they will begin to kill everyone who has an abortion.

why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

Hey did you see Helen Keller's dress? No, she's dead.

What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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